Only some criminals have cachet

SEATTLE, Washington - The biographical page* of the Bantam paperback version of Genet's Our Lady of the Flowers states the following:

One of the most provocative literary figures of the twentieth century, Jean Genet - like Villon and Rimbaud - is in the great French tradition of the writer-criminal.

Should the writer be the only criminal that we romanticize in this way? I guess combining writer and criminal results in something interesting to us. I've tried to think of another example:

Milkman-criminal

The chef-criminal
The secretary-criminal
The therapist-criminal**
The engineer-criminal
The barista-criminal
The endocrinologist-criminal
The sculptor-criminal
The seamstress-criminal

Nothing seems to be working.

* I'm trying to find out what the biographical page of a book is called, without success.

** This one has potential, if you include Freudian psychoanalysis, which was one of the great frauds of the 20th century. I don't know if "therapist" instead of "analyst" is a correct term for those charlatans.

A few reasons to prefer cats to dogs

Clean - like my conscience

SEATTLE, Washington - Cats have quite a few characteristics that make them better to have around then dogs. The first one is obvious - the typical cat has much more contempt for humans than the typical dog. I like that.

One other thing is the cleanliness angle. I was at a friend's house last weekend, and they have a dog, and the dog smelled a little bit. Not a lot, probably the average dog smell, but it's noticeable and this is in spite of the dog getting bathed.

I've had my cat for 11+ years and never cleaned her. Yet, I just took a deep sniff of her torso, and she smells like she just popped out of the clothes dryer. They handle this themselves.

Congrats, Harrison Ford and Calista Flockhart!

SEATTLE, Washington - Harrison Ford, 66, and Calista Flockhart, 44, have gotten engaged after seven years of romance.

But, Mr Ford, don't think this eliminates the doubts about your sexual orientation - I can tell from all the Google searches bringing people to my posts on the topic that there is still significant speculation on the issue.

Daniel Craig as James Bond

SEATTLE, Washington - I finally got around to seeing Casino Royale with Daniel Craig as Bond. And let me say, the days of graying old Pierce Brosnan sipping on his martinis are dead and buried. Craig is Bitter and Badass and Totally Yoked. I think, for the next few years, the Bond bad guys are going to be in even more trouble than usual.

This correction of the movie review is probably more entertaining than the movie

SEATTLE, Washington - This correction was run by the New York Times regarding its review of the movie Save Me:

A film review on Sept. 5 about “Save Me” confused some characters and actors. It is Mark, not Chad, who is sent to the Genesis House retreat for converting gay men to heterosexuality. (Mark is played by Chad Allen; there is no character named Chad). The hunky fellow resident is Scott (played by Robert Gant), not Ted (Stephen Lang). And it is Mark and Scott — not “Chad and Ted” — who partake of cigarettes and “furtive man-on-man action.”

found via Regret the Error

George Takei: similar to the losers from your small hometown

SEATTLE, Washington - George Takei married his longtime partner Brad Altman this past weekend in Los Angeles.

The notable thing here is not that it's a same-sex wedding, or that it was a multicultural-to-the-point-of-satire ceremony, but that Uhura was the maid of honor and Chekhov was the best man.

Has Mr Takei not made any friends since the late 1960s that could have served in these roles? Someone from the Howard Stern show, maybe? Anyone? This seems just like the rear-guard folks in your hometown, still hanging out with the same high school crowd while everyone with a crumb of adventurousness or ambition left a long time ago.

But congrats to Mr Takei anyway.

I'll say it again - Fabio is a great trash-talker

SEATTLE, Washington - Fabio keeps an eagle eye out for media coverage of The Fabio, and straightens out anyone who gets their facts wrong. He tracked down the Details interview of him that I discussed in January and had a few choice words for the editor of Details, Daniel Peres. This is the entire letter:

Dear Mr. Peres:

I know they say any publicity is good publicity, but I must admin that I was disappointed by the tone of your article. For the record: My teeth are not capped, my eyes are not green and the 1980's are not a blur to me. By the looks of it, I would say that the interview must have been a blur to your writer.

Sincerely,
Fabio

I've made the switch

SEATTLE, Washington - No, I'm not turning gay. Though, maybe I'd be happier gay, and it would certainly be easier to get sex.

No, I've changed my Linux home desktop from Gentoo to Kubuntu. For one thing, there seems to be a bit of chaos at the Gentoo Foundation; Ubuntu has what Linux needs, some corporate backing from a mad billionaire and momentum.

Beyond that, the Kubuntu graphical software installer has been a nice break from two years of compiling all software from source in Gentoo. I wasn't engaging in any optimizations that made compiling from scratch worth it.

And Kubuntu has operated more smoothly in some day-to-day tasks, like plugging in my mp3 player via USB.

Obviously, I chose Kubuntu instead of Ubuntu because GNOME is for losers.

More straight talk from Fabio

SEATTLE, Washington - Fabio has a very stylish command of the English language, especially considering that he is an immigrant. He was recently interviewed on the Details blog and provided yet more choice material.

First he shared some thoughts on his tiff with George Clooney that I wrote about in November.

"This guy, he ate more than he could chew... Right then, I could have knocked him over and beat him," he says. "I could have punched him in the face while he was on his back. That's how you really hurt someone—their face can't amortize the punch so it takes, it takes the whole impact."

"Their face can't amortize the punch!" I wish I had thought of that one.

He also claims to be developing an energy drink for which he predicts smashing success:

"I wish I could tell you, but it's a secret. I'm sitting on this gold mine for a long time. It's like you're looking all over your house for your car keys and it turns out you are sitting on them, that's what this is like."

He also shared his innermost thoughts on what he's thinking while out on a date with an actress:

"And they are always complaining about their work, or how they are not working. About this casting or this part they are hoping to get, and I have to say, 'Come on, you're a fucking waitress.' I don't say that, but I think that, you know, because I'm a gentleman."

That's exactly what I think when I'm on a date with a hot actress.

Found via Mollygood

Harrison Ford looks like a Cap Hill old gay guy

SEATTLE, Washington - What the hell is going on with Han Solo? With the earring, black t-shirt that shows a bit of bicep, and slightly mysterious hair color, Harrison Ford has the classic Cap Hill older gay gentleman look.

He could stroll into the Broadway Grill on Sunday morning for the breakfast buffet, and he'd look like every other guy there.

OK, I mirrored the pictures to put the earring in the gay ear - but still.

The rest of the gallery is at Celebslam.

We almost had fisticuffs between George Clooney and Fabio

SEATTLE, Washington - Celebslam breaks the news that George Clooney and Fabio got into a shoving match at a Los Angeles restaurant.

I want to personally thank Fabio for telling Clooney to "stop being a diva".

This post sponsored by I Can't Believe it's not Butter